The first one is this: "I see," said the blind man to his deaf son, while his lame daughter danced.
Another version of this one is: "I see," said the blind man, to his deaf dog, as he picked up his hammer and saw.
The previous two examples are something called a "wellerism". Wikipedia has an interesting article here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wellerism
The second one goes like this:
One bright day, in the middle of the night
Two dead boys got up to fight
Back to back, they faced each other
Drew their swords and shot each other
A deaf policeman heard the noise
And came and shot the two dead boys
If you don't believe this story is true,
Ask the blind man, he saw it too.
Doing a Google search of the opening line, gave me the following link: http://www.folklore.bc.ca/Onefineday.htm. It seems like an interesting read and provides some analysis of the rhyme. It also has the complete rhyme, whereas my father only told me part of it. I guess that is one of the problems with oral tradition.
Aren't opposites fun?